More Than Me And After Me
Though difficult to imagine at first, I’ve reflected on any possible “gift” of Covid 19. I’ve found for me, there’s been more time to reflect on questions like the meaning of life, my role in it, and what truly matters.
Similar questions arose for me many years ago at the age of 19. At that time, finding the answers was a struggle. They finally came to me after taking a break from college, spending six months hitchhiking across the country meditating, jogging and doing yoga in the US and Canadian Rocky Mountains. (Oh, and I did find some answers, but that’s another story!)
Decades later, my answers have a similar theme though a different form.
What truly matters on a day-to-day basis is the quality of my relationships, which seems to be entirely based on the quality of our communication. I’ve learned so much about the art of relating — especially with challenging people or in challenging moments — that it has been the backbone of my work.
The other thing that truly matters is that my thoughts, feelings and actions are in alignment. And that I live with a knowing that I am connected to something outside of me, call it Source, Soul, my higher self, inner guidance or as my high school friend and incredible teacher, Debra Poneman, calls it, “The God of Your Understanding.” Yes. That connection really is the core of what makes me feel whole. At home in the world. And I believe it is essential to having a meaningful, happy life, which has become my life purpose.
My 25 years in the modern dance field with a passion for choreography and expression of the human condition taught me the value of embodiment, and the power of having my dancers authentically feel the emotions they were expressing on stage.
I combined that background with my study of the Enneagram personality system.
This evolved into EnneaMotion, using movement to explore and embody the range of emotions described by the Enneagram. It quickly became apparent that as I applied the teaching to myself, I was changing. Instead of being shy, withdrawn and not having a voice, I started to embody a previously elusive quality, an easy, natural self-confidence — a natural quality of The Leader. In fact, I had created a new neural pathway; one that carries the ability to hold my ground, to stand up for myself, and finally, I found my voice.
In fact, I became more emotionally flexible and gained the ability to embody more of the gifts and less of the challenges of all of the types.
I came to see that increasing emotional range plus emotional flexibility are the essential ingredients of increasing emotional intelligence.
More Than Me
In the same way that I expanded the Enneagram field to include embodiment, all of those who have studied, been coached and trained by me have also brought their unique gifts into this work as well.
My students have brought Integral Coaching, Transpersonal Psychology, Positive Psychology, InterPlay, NIA, yoga, chi gong, theatre and other elements into embodiment work with the Enneagram.
They are bringing their unique selves to this work, expanding what it does, how it does it, and who it impacts.
It has become more than me.
Then came Somatic Focusing, my coaching modality. By asking the client their body’s “felt sense” of a disturbing emotion, challenge or situation, we go into it, and re-create that felt sense for a short moment. Then, much like creating an antidote to a poisonous snake bite or creating a flu vaccine, we get a taste of that which the client doesn’t want. We shift the energy in the body. By listening to the body’s wisdom, I guide the client in creating a “custom-designed” antidote which is powerful in promoting easy, deep and lasting change.
Here’s an example. A senior leader of a global corporation with anger problems had been sent to “Anger Management” programs without results. He was known as a “tough nut.” After coaching with me, he found his heart, was ready to “step into the ring of emotion,” and wanted his “whole heart to be present.” He became a different father, partner, and yes, a better leader.
After Somatic Focusing, I created the EQ Quiz (based on the Enneagram) and the unique way I deliver the assessments.
After delivering over a thousand assessments, I’ve noticed that identifying your “core type” is just the beginning. ALL of the scores impact each other and impact you to either empower you or challenge you, in the same ways, over and over again. The Blueprint (the pie chart of your results) is like a guide for our coaching together. For example, after her assessment, Judy said:
Your EQ Quiz has integrity; this is a quiz that matters. I now see the huge price I’ve paid — the consequences of adapting to others and not addressing my own needs. You revealed it for me in a new way.
This gave me hope and many how-to’s. I feel a “moving beyond” in me. Now I can see how to finally and fully remove all remnants of what has had the power to pull at me.
I now have insight and compassion for these old childhood patterns that were still running.
My heart feels different and without fear. What you have revealed is important and quite useful. I have new clarity and determination, inspired by your particular wisdom.
I believe that this work — EnneaMotion, Somatic Focusing and the EQ Quiz Assessment — is a doorway to Emotional Mastery.
That means being in charge of your emotions, which rule your thoughts, your actions and your life. With this work, you can live your life by choice, not by old patterns that no longer serve you.
Emotional Mastery teaches the art of respectful communication so people everywhere are heard and understood so they can have healthy, thriving relationships. It directs people back to their heart’s desire and fuels their well-being so they can have a meaningful, happy life.
My passion now is to expand this work through coaching, training and certifying others so they can continue making the world a better place. Stay tuned for some upcoming opportunities to work with me!
Click Here for your FREE EQ Toolkit
It includes your quiz, your Blueprint (the pie chart of your results), the Interpretation Guide and the “Just the Whammies” training video so you can understand what may be holding you back.